Monthly Archives: July 2020

cremation services offered in Greenbelt, MD

Coming to Grips with Grief

After cremations as part of the cremation services offered in Greenbelt, MD, you will begin the journey through the grieving process. You may find that for the first few days after your loved one dies, you feel emotionally numb, and as if you’re in shock. That’s common, and it is one of the ways that your body and mind help you navigate through all that you need to do during that time without completely falling apart.

Once the flurry of activity that initially surrounds death is over, though, the numbness and the shock wear off, and you’re left with a raw and intense sense of loss and sadness. Grief is hard to describe when you’re in the middle of its most intense moments.

You may be unable to identify all the feelings that you are having, but you know that they all make you feel sad. Many of these feelings end up being anger, fear, regrets, guilt, loneliness, and pain. They may incapacitate you sometime and make you edgy and restless at other times.

It may be impossible to make sense of them, but reading words others have written about grief in the face of death can sometimes give you some clarity and insight, as well as some much-needed assurance that you are not losing your mind.

Here are some very helpful examples.

“The risk of love is loss, and the price of loss is grief–but the pain of grief is only a shadow when compared with the pain of never risking love.”

Hilary Stanton Zunin

“You will lose someone you can’t live without, and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly–that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp.”

Anne Lamott

“I should know enough about a loss to realize that you never really stop missing someone–you just learn to live around the huge gaping hole of their absence.”

Alyson Noel, Evermore

“There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.”

Washington Irving

“Guilt is perhaps the most painful companion to death.”

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

“Those who have suffered understand suffering and therefore extend their hand.”

Patti Smith

“There are no happy endings.

Endings are the saddest part,

So just give me a happy middle

And a very happy start.”

Shel Silverstein, A Light in the Attic

“Happiness is beneficial for the body, but it is grief that develops the powers of the mind.”

Marcel Proust, In Search of Lost Time

“Have you ever lost someone you love and wanted one more conversation, one more chance to make up for the time when you thought they would be here forever? If so, then you know you can go your whole life collecting days, and none will outweigh the one you wish you had back.”

Mitch Albom, For One More Day

“Grief does not change you. It reveals you.”

John Green, The Fault in Our Stars

If you want information about cremation services offered in Greenbelt, MD, you can talk with our expert staff at Donald V. Borgwardt Funeral Home, P.A.

funeral homes in Greenbelt, MD

The Basics Included in an Obituary

When composing obituaries at funeral homes in Greenbelt, MD, you should try to capture as much of the spirit of your loved one and their life is as possible to give readers a good sense of who they were as a person.

Be innovative and creative to create a picture of your loved one that is warm, genuine, and comforting. But while you’re using your creative powers to encapsulate your loved one’s life, you should not forget to include some basic information in their obituary.

One thing that you should be sure to include in your loved one’s obituary is their full name and the date of their death and the location of their death. For location information, include only the city and the state (or country) where they died.

Do not include a street address. There are unscrupulous people who regularly scan obituaries with the intention of committing crimes. These can range from burglarizing the residence during times they know the family will not be at home to trying to scam grieving families out of assets and property.

Another thing that you should include in your loved one’s obituary is important events in their life. You can include their place of birth, but avoid putting their full date of birth, since this information can be used fraudulently (instead just put the year of their birth). You can include their marriage date and their spouse’s name (if applicable).

You can also include their education and career information, highlighting important achievements and awards they may have gotten. If your loved one was a military veteran, you can include the branch of military service they served in and any wars, if applicable, that they fought in.

Immediate family members should also be included in your loved one’s obituary. The general rule of thumb is to first list family members who died before your loved one and then list family members who survive them.

Be sure to include parents, spouses, children (with spouses’ first names in parentheses), grandchildren (with spouses’ first names in parentheses), and siblings (with spouses’ first names in parentheses). If there were other family members that were especially close or important to your loved one, you should include them in their obituary as well.

Make sure that all the funeral information for your loved one is included. This information will include the viewing or visitation, the funeral service, and the graveside service.

The viewing or visitation information should include the funeral home name, the date of the viewing or visitation, and the times of the viewing or visitation. The funeral service information should have the location where the funeral service will be held, the date of the funeral service, and the time of the funeral service.

Graveside service information should include the name of the cemetery where your loved one will be buried, the date of the graveside service, and the time of the graveside service. The funeral home will give you the time when everyone who wants to be part of the funeral procession should meet at the funeral home (they will also announce this at the end of the funeral service).

Your loved one’s obituary should also include memorial tribute information. Many people ask for charitable or memorial fund donations instead of flowers, so you can list any charities or funds that you’d like donations to be made in the name of your loved one.

Finally, you should include a photo of your loved one in their obituary. You can choose either an old photo or a current one, but make sure that it’s a high-resolution photo that is not blurry and doesn’t show a lot of wear and tear.

If you’d like to know more about writing obituaries at funeral homes in Greenbelt, MD, you can talk with our knowledgeable team at Donald V. Borgwardt Funeral Home, P.A.

cremation services offered in Beltsville, MD

Customizing Cremations

There are many cremation services offered in Beltsville, MD, so you have many different ways to customize your cremation or the cremation of a loved one.

Whether you’re preplanning your own cremation or you are making cremation arrangements for a loved one, your funeral director can offer advice and assistance to help you create the cremation you want.

First, you can choose what you want to do with the cremation remains. Cremation remains can be used in many different ways, so you can choose to do several different things with them.

For instance, you may want a portion of the cremation remains put into an urn to keep or be buried in a cemetery, but you also want some of the cremation remains made into memorial jewelry and some of them to be scattered in a special place.

Your funeral home has a wide selection of urns (indoor and outdoor) to choose from for storing cremation remains or burying them. Likewise, your funeral has many cremation jewelry designs for you to pick from so you’re sure to find something that will fit everyone’s taste and style.

The portion of cremation that you want to scatter will be given to you in a cremation container so that you can take them or have them shipped to the place where they will be scattered. Some people have special ceremonies with family and close friends when they scatter the cremation remains, while other people decide to simply scatter them.

With cremation, you can choose to have a service before the cremation happens or after the cremation happens. If you choose to have a service before the cremation takes place, then you can also have a visitation or a viewing as well (you don’t have to, however).

The service you hold can range from having all the elements of a traditional funeral service to having friends and family meet at a restaurant or a favorite vacation spot to hold a memorial tribute that includes stories and memories.

You have the ability to customize the service in almost any way you choose. Some people hold services that combine elements of funeral services, such as readings and spiritual comfort, with a more informal format that allows mourners to convey their own thoughts on the life and the impact of the deceased.

Just as with burials, military honors can be included with services for cremations for military veterans. Your funeral director can make all the arrangements to have these honors provided by a local military installation or veteran’s organization.

Many services for cremations are also followed by a reception that includes food and drinks (if the service isn’t held in a restaurant or at a special place). Some funeral homes have caterers they work with who can provide food and drinks for the reception, but usually, friends or church congregations organize and supply the provisions for the reception.

If you want some of the cremation remains buried, you can choose to have them stored in a columbarium (aboveground burial – niches may be inside a mausoleum or self-contained in a standalone structure) or buried in a cemetery.

If you want the cremation remains buried in a cemetery, the funeral director can make the arrangements and make sure that the cremation remains are put into an urn designed to be buried. Most cemeteries require that urns and caskets be buried inside a vault, but your funeral director will take care of providing that as well.

If you want more information about cremation services offered in Beltsville, MD, you can talk with our expert staff at Donald V. Borgwardt Funeral Home, P.A.

funeral homes in Beltsville, MD

If You’ve Never Needed Funeral Homes Before

If you’ve never needed funeral homes in Beltsville, MD, you may feel uncertain about the funeral process and how the funeral home staff will treat your deceased loved one and you and your family.

The relationship with a funeral home and the families it serves is a trust relationship that must be established. That is why you often see generations of families, no matter where they live, return to use a funeral home over and over as loved ones die.

If this is the first time you’ve had a loved one die and you’re responsible for planning their funeral, how do you find a funeral home if you don’t have an established relationship with one already?

There are several ways to go about this.

One of the best ways to get recommendations from your friends and neighbors (or, if your loved one was in hospice care, from hospice care’s social worker). People who have lived in your community for a while will be able to give you good suggestions from their experiences.

Once you have a list of recommendations, talk with each funeral home on the list and let them know what you’d like for your loved one’s funeral arrangements. If there are specialized or customized services that you want, make sure to let the funeral home know in this meeting.

While all funeral homes may be able to provide what you want and need for your loved one, ultimately, the decision of which funeral home you choose to place your trust incomes from the connection you make with them in this first meeting.

A variety of tangible and intangible factors will guide your final decision, but a funeral home’s demeanor (friendliness, kindness, care, and empathy, among others) and responsiveness will play a lead role.

Personality compatibility will also be a factor. Just as in other areas of your life, you just “click” with certain people, you will find a funeral director that you just “click” with. That’s not to diminish any other funeral homes or funeral directors. That’s just how we as humans often get to a final decision, with most other things being equal.

You should look at the funeral home’s history in the community. If you ask 10 friends and neighbors for a funeral home recommendation, and the majority name the same funeral home, then you know this funeral home has a good and reputable history in the community.

You should also look at the services the funeral home is able to provide. Can they accommodate a funeral in their location or another location of your choice and provide all the services you want in either location?

Does the funeral home have the ability to record the funeral service and/or provide virtual access to the funeral service because of social distancing restrictions or, if there are no restrictions because some people can’t come to the funeral service in person?

Does the funeral home have the ability to host a funeral reception on their premises, and what amenities are provided (free or for a cost)?

What kind of resources does the funeral home have for aftercare when the funeral is over? Do they have access to community resources that offer grief support and grief counseling, if necessary? Does the funeral home itself sponsor grief support after the funeral?

When you chose a funeral home, they will do everything they can to build your trust and you can be assured that they will take the best care possible of your loved one, you, and your family.

If you’d like to know more about funerals at funeral homes in Beltsville, MD, you can talk with our knowledgeable team at Donald V. Borgwardt Funeral Home, P.A.